me: closes wrong tab
me: PTERODACTYL NOISE
me when i first joined tumblr
me: what how can this person reply to a reply?
how did they get that theme? it wasn't on the list of themes. they must be a wizard.
wow that person just got their 50th follower they are so tumblr famous wow
wow that was weird that fanfic had a sex scene i hope i never see that again
oh my god i messaged this person with how much i love their blog and they replied with a thank you and a smiley face, look at me making friends on tumblr already
My mom is yelling at my brother and I overheard this.
Mom: GO TO YOUR ROOM
Brother: that's not fair
Mom: DO AS I SAY.
Brother: You never send Lizzie to her room when she's in trouble!!
Mom: Lizzie never leaves her room. If she were in trouble I'd make her sit in the living room or go outside or talk to human beings.
Me: I CAN HEAR YOU.
(I work in a Coffee Shop. I was on break in the lobby when a couple walks in. Directly behind them is a cute little boy in Batman costume.)
Me: “Oh my God! It’s BATMAN!”
(The boy stops, strikes a pose and starts looking around menacingly. After a few seconds, he approaches the counter.)
Mother: “Jeff, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.”
Mother: “The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?”
Boy: “Yes. Yes, The Batman would.”
(The couple pays while the boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)
Boy: *sips* “Gotham is safe.”
Is there someplace I can go to talk to someone?
I’m looking for a neurodiversity oriented group for people with mental health diagnoses to talk without having to deal with psychobigotry.
And/or a place for abuse survivors to work through shit.
Please help?
Man Smashed His Newborn Daughter’s Skull With a Cinder Block Because He Couldn’t Afford Another Baby
Know a liberal who’s feeling down in the dumps? Cheer him up by sending him a link to this story!
Yes, because all liberals hate newborns and children. I’ve read this story and here’s what should have happened:
- The couple should have been able to get affordable contraceptives so they could have sex and be intimate without worrying about a pregnancy.
- If they still became pregnant, they should have been able to get an affordable abortion at a clinic where they are not harassed by protesters screaming “don’t kill your child,” “god doesn’t want you to do this,” and carrying signs of aborted fetuses.
- Finally, if the two still had the child, she should have been able to give it up for adoption and know that her child would go to a good home and would likely live a good life.
Instead, you take a tragedy and make it into a joke about how liberals love crime and dead newborns. Congratulations.
^
Tumblr's response to domestic violence
Chris Brown: OMG WHAT A FUCKING ASSHOLE HOW DARE HE BE FAMOUS WHAT A DICK.
Michael Fassbender: *cricket*...*cricket*...
“Do I get stress headaches at work? Yes, definitely. From the moment I get in, it’s “Denise we need this! Denise we need that!” Which is stressful… ‘cause my name is Linda. Denise is the other black woman that works here. By 10am, someone in the copy room makes a joke about Kobe Bryant, and everyone looks at me to make sure it’s ok. And I smile like it’s ok. But really, my head and neck are starting to throb. Then I spend the rest of my afternoon training my interns, and answering their questions, like, “Yes, black people use shampoo”, and, “No, I don’t know any good reggae clubs around here”, and, “Yes, Condoleezza Rice is very articulate, why do you sound so surprised?” And, “No, I can’t tell you where to buy weed!” And that’s when I reach for Excedrin.”
